2"Love your wife in
the same way you love your body and your life."(Ephesians 5:28-33) You
care for your body daily to be as well fed and healthy as possible. You quickly
take care of any needs or desires. Any sexual desire as a husband should be
cared for with your wife. In the same way, care for your wife's needs and well
being. Feel your wife's pain and illness and rejoice in her health as if it
were your own life. A husband must see his wife's sexual desires and make
supreme efforts to meet those needs too. Basically, her need or desire whether
financial, physical, emotional or spiritual in your relationship must receive
your full effort. Only in this way can you love her and provide for her just as
well as you do for yourself.
3"Be considerate as
you live with your wife, with respect ..."(I Peter 3:7) The Bible says
that if we neglect this command, our prayers will be hindered! To be
considerate, quit any irritating habits! When she needs to be helped carrying
heavy items, do it! If she needs time you can take care of the family! Help
your wife with all of your energy, show your love to her with all
consideration. Pray to see where you may be inconsiderate.
4"Do not be harsh
with your wife."(Colossians 3:19) When a wife is sensitive realize that
harsh answers, angry looks, irritated tones of voice and impatience will deeply
affect your wife. Rejoice that she is a lady and isn't like you - remember that
she is a precious gift God has given you.
5"The husband's
body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife."(I Corinthians
7:3-5) Please your wife physically. Don't deprive her of what she needs. Your
wife may not tell you that she would like to climax during times of intimacy.
Assume that she would like to orgasm and work to please her. A wife might
become more active in sex if her desires were being met! Sexual pleasure is
something that is given, not forced or taken.
6"Rejoice in your
wife all your life. Let her breasts satisfy you. Be captivated with
her."(Proverbs 5:18-19) No man should look at other women or pictures of
other women when he has a wife on whom he can gaze daily. A husband should
become fully satisfied with his wife's body. No matter what the size or shape,
if a man will let it happen, and ask God to help him, he can grow to truly find
his wife's breasts to be the most attractive in the world. This is the true
spirit of being captivated with your wife. Such a wife will feel sexy,
attractive, and most of all, ladylike.
7"And that women
may be dressed in simple clothing, with a quiet and serious air; not with
vanity about her hair and gold or jewels or expensive clothing;"(1 Timothy
2:9) Encourage your wife to be modest in public and erotic in private with you.
A modest woman is a lady. There is much sin and temptation that results from
women showing too much skin in public. Just think of the pleasure of knowing
that no one sees too much of your wife's legs but you! You will be shocked at
how this one maneuver will increase your feelings of masculinity and her
feelings of femininity.
8"Do not be
captivated by other women."(Proverbs 5:20) Finding other women attractive
and looking at them will erode your own view of your wife. You will be less
satisfied with her and she will feel less special to you. No man can build a
habit of glances without subconsciously doing it in his wife's company. And she
will notice. Remember to be captivated with your wife and no one else. She will
feel like the Queen of the world and you will fall further in love with her.
9"Call your wife
'blessed' and praise her."(Proverbs 31:28-29) Tell her that she is special
and is greater than any other woman on earth. Don't just mention her physical
beauty, but her care for you, her hard work, and her ladylike attributes. Watch
the flower of your wife blossom as you repeatedly fill her ears with your
praises. She longs for those words and she wants to hear them from you! Of
course you don't need pride, but that does not change the wife's need and
longing to be treasured.
10"Tell your wife
how captivated you are with her body."(Song of Solomon 4:7; 7:1-8) A true
lover will make sure that his wife knows that he finds no flaw in her. God made
your wife. God makes no mistakes. If you find a part of her body flawed, then
it is your mind that needs to be changed. The responsibility upon the man to
grow to love and express love for every part of his wife and also to
respectfully and sensually tell her so. It will not help to criticize her or to
be sarcastic. Think of how good she will feel when both you and she truly
believe that you are enamored with every part of her!
11"Honor your
marriage; keep it pure by remaining true to your wife in every
way."(Hebrews 13:4) Jesus says that "lustful looks are
adultery."(Matthew 5:28) This is similar to "because where your
treasure is there will your heart be also..."(Luke 12:34) and vice versa.
Do not treasure such lustfulness in any area of life, but deny it access to you
heart. Keep your marriage pure by training your heart and eyes to be true to
your wife. Your marriage will reap huge benefits if you do!
Thank the Lord for
beauty and appreciate it but keep your eye, joy, mind and heart for the wife.
12"Be thankful for
your wife and realize the favor you have received from God."(Proverbs
18:22) Just think of how lonely you would be without a wife. Adam was alone and
it wasn't good for him to be alone, so God gave him a wife. You have a lifetime
companion, a friend, and a lover to enjoy every day. What a blessing! Thank God
and pray for her daily. She is a tremendous "prize" from God.
13"Be one flesh
with your wife in every way."(Matthew 19:5) Enjoy life with her as if you
were inseparable, but live your life thoughtfully. Long to be with her like you
did when you first met. Rush home from work to her. Think about her during the
day. Call her every day. Learn as a couple to agree: be like minded. Enjoy
intimacy and sex often. You should have sex as often as is necessary to meet
the desires of whichever spouse has the stronger sex drive, and as schedules
and health permit. Spend time just talking and sharing the day's events. Show a
genuine interest - listening intently - giving your full attention and eye
contact. Your wife is more important than anything or anyone but Jesus Christ.
Be as one with your wife.
© 2012 Max Shimba
Ministries
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